


Memories Don't Matter

by Hufflepuffle4



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Betrayal, Break Up, F/F, F/M, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Multi, One Night Stands, Other, Romance, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-03 23:26:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13351716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hufflepuffle4/pseuds/Hufflepuffle4
Summary: Kaylee Claire, the Sole Survivor of Vault 111 has just woken up. She isn't sure what happened, but according to Deacon, she was injured and fell pretty far. All Kaylee knows is that most of her friends don't want to talk to her and those who do are treating her like she's a china doll. Something isn't right, and even Kaylee realizes that something huge has changed when she starts living someone else's personality. Can Kaylee find a way to fix this before she loses herself, and potentially, her son?





	1. Wake Up

Author’s Note: Welcome to Pain. This chapter is ALL over the place, but I gotta start somewhere because plot. So.   
Kaylee laid in the pod, barely breathing. MacCready squeezed her hand. THe two were fighting tears, but not saying anything. Nick Valentine, Piper, Preston, everyone that she had loved and cared for were around her. Hancock, her closest friend, had refused to be there. He didn’t do grief.   
“Are you sure this is what you want?” RJ asked for the tenth time. KAylee chuckled softly.  
“Yes, Robert, it is. It’ll give someone a chance to save my son.” She said. Deacon leaned against the other pod. Inside, lay a synth that looked identical to the Sole Survivor.   
“Look at it this way, you’ll have a brand new girlfriend, and you won’t have to fight for her affection.” He tried. MacCready shot him a look, and Piper tried to smile.   
“Blue, you can’t just.. I…” She shook her head. Dr. Amari stepped into the room.   
“If everything goes the way that we expect, she’ll believe that she’s you, Kaylee.” She began. Nick kept shaking his head, and Preston was staring hard at the floor. “In fact, I’ll make sure she doesn't even remember getting sick. Deacon, you and the Railroad can help her adjust, right?”  
“Of Course, Doc.” Deacon couldn’t even smile.   
Why had he been so stupid?  
“Good. We should begin.” Dr. Amari placed a hand on MacCready’s shoulder. He was shaking.   
“I love you, Spots.” He whispered.   
“I love you too, Sharp.” He let go of her hand, and the pod closed. 

 

I gasped for air, coughed. I looked around the screen in my way, trying to catch my breath. Deacon and Dr. Amrai were the only ones in the room. Slowly, the Pod opened. I tried to stand, and crumpled into Deacon.  
“Woah, careful Boss. YOu gave us quite the scare.” He grinned at me.   
“Wha-what happened?” I asked. I felt so off. Like I wasn't right. The pod next to me was covered with a black sheet.   
“You nearly died on me. You took a bullet to the chest, and I had to bravely drag you all the way here through heavy gunfire.” Deacon bragged.   
“Bullshit.” I laughed. He shrugged.   
“Worth a shot.” I finally stood up on my own. There was a mirror across the room, and I walked slowly towards it.   
I looked myself over. My pale skin was marked by bright white patched as always, and my green eyes stared back at me. I touched my face. My hair was tied back into its usual bun. Something just wasn’t right. Maybe I had been injured?   
“So, what really happened?” I asked.   
“You did get hurt, and you fell pretty far. WE thought you were gonna die.”   
“We?”  
“Everyone’s upstairs. RJ, Nick, Piper, Preston, and not Hancock. He didn’t want to be around if you died.” Deacon explained. My armour was sitting on a table nearby. I walked over to it, and began getting it on. I was wearing some road leathers. Weird. Usually I wore my vault suit.  
“Did my vault suit get ruined in the fall?”   
“Oh, yeah. We can find you a new one, if you want.” Deacon offered. Dr. Amari was making notes on a clipboard. I huffed.   
“Alright, well, let’s get out of here. I need to see my sharpshooter.” We walked upstairs, and only Nick was there. I frowned. “Where’s Mac?” I asked him.   
“He...He uh, left.” He said. Deacon sighed.   
“Is he at the Third Rail? I want to see him.”   
“That’s not the best idea right now, Kay. He’s still pretty stressed from...what happened.” Nick took a drag from his cigarette. I shrugged.   
“I’m fine, Nick. I didn’t die.”   
“Boss, I just remembered, Desdemona wants to see us. She said she might have a lead on a new Synth that needs our help.” I turned back to Deacon. His eyes were covered with his sunglasses, so I couldn’t tell what he was feeling. Everyone seemed so angry with me.   
Man, I hope I hadn’t jumped. 

 

Deacon and I headed to Railroad HQ, and everyone stopped. Glory broke out into a huge grin.  
“Hey Whisper. How’s it going?” She asked. I smirked back at her.   
“It’s going okay, Glory.”  
“You feeling alright? Adjusting to everything?”  
“Adjusting? Yeah…” I gave her a questioning look.   
Everyone seemed really happy to see me here, and yet I couldn’t see any of my other friends? What the hell?  
Dez sent Deacon and I on a search and rescue mission, which was successful. WE camped out not far from Sanctuary for the night after we returned the synth to HQ. I couldn’t shake something was wrong, and yet I felt fine? Physically I felt like myself, but nothing else felt right.  
“Boss?” Deacon said again. I looked up.   
“What?”  
“What the plan for watch tonight? Me or you?”  
“Uh, I’ll watch. You get some sleep.” I muttered. Deacon shrugged, and laid down. I spent the night looking out for raiders or animals. Initially, my mind kept wandering to whatever had happened. I couldn’t remember anything about this accident, or anything directly after for that matter. The last thing I remembered was promising RJ that I’d be okay. I couldn’t remember anything after that.   
We got to Snacuary the next day, and to my surprise Piper and Rj were there.   
“Mac!” I shouted. He turned to me, and made a face. I ran over to him, expecting to be picked up in a hug. He didn’t move. “Hey! I..I missed you.” I smiled at him.   
“Yeah, me too Kaylee.” He took a step back. Deacon was behind me, and RJ looked back at him. His eyes narrowed.   
“What’s wrong, Mac?”   
“Huh? Oh, nothing. Look, I’m gonna head to Good Neighbor, see if I can’t pick up some work.” He pushed past me, and walked away. I looked at Piper. She seemed sad.   
“What did I do? He isn’t mad because of the fall is he?” I asked her.   
“THe-? Oh, he’s just upset because you scared us.” She smiled. “I’m just glad you’re okay, Blue.” She pulled me into a tight hug, and I realized that she was the only one to actually touch me since I woke up. I held on for a little while.  
“I didn’t mean to scare everyone.” I whispered. She hugged me tighter.   
“I know. Be more careful, okay? We can’t replace you.” She said. I giggled.   
“I’ll try, but you know me. I live for danger.”


	2. Questions Need Answers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck at updating, I'm not even going to pretend I don't.

After taking a week to rest, as Deacon and Piper had insisted on, I finally was ready to head back into the Institute. I headed to the Boston Airport, because I realized that I hadn’t seen Danse in a while.   
“Paladin Danse.” I stood behind him and saluted. He turned around, his eyes wide.  
“Kaylee! Robert told me you were sick.” He looked me up and down. I gave him a s confused smile.   
“Nope, I’m fine. Apparently I fell off a building downtown, and nearly died. Deacon and Mac saved my life.” I explained. Danse’s eyebrows furrowed.   
“Well, it’s about time you reported for duty. Elder Maxson will want to meet with you.” He led me to the Molecular Relay. Maxson was having it disassembled.   
“...Keep the components.” He ordered.   
“Elder?” He turned, and seemed surprised to see me as well.   
“Knight, where have you been.” I saluted him.   
“I was injured in battle, sir. Despite my desire to come back since we still know so little about the Institute, a few of my allies insisted that I rest so I could come back at full strength.” I explained. Danse smiled down at me.   
Hang on, when did he get this cute?  
“Well, I am glad to see that you’re ready for action, soldier, but you should have alerted us to your continued survival. Have you altered anyone else?” He glared at me.   
“The Minutemen, Sir. I found it imperative, since I am the General.” I smirked.   
“Very well. Return to the Institute, and make sure they haven’t become suspicious with your sudden absence.” Elder Maxson turned away, and I stuck my tongue out. Danse rolled his eyes.   
“Kaylee, I’m glad you’re back, but please be careful in there.” He placed an armoured hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him.   
“I will, Danse. I’m always careful!”  
“Except when you fell off a building?”   
“Exactly!” I cracked a grin. Danse rolled his eyes again, but this time he smiled. I looked down at my Pip-Boy, and set the coordinates to the Institute. I looked up at Danse again. “I’ll be back soon, Dansey-Pants.”

With a flash, Kaylee was gone. Danse made a face. She seemed off. He shook his head. She was just recovering, who knows how far she fell? Despite Rhys’ warnings, Danse cared very deeply for her. Her determination, her ruthless pride and demeanor had captured his attention. Maybe it was the break in military routine. He shook his head. That woman would be the death of him.   
“I wouldn’t trust her.” Someone said. Danse turned around. RJ MacCready stood against a wall, smoking a cigarette.   
“Why is that?” Danse gripped his weapon a little tighter. He knew that MacCready hated the Brotherhood.   
“She didn’t seem off to you? Even a little?” He looked up at Danse. “Trust me on this one. She isn’t herself.” 

 

I shook my hair out. I hated that teleportation. It was so weird feeling. Some scientists stopped, and looked at me.   
“Well, she’s alive.” Someone snapped. I turned. Dr. Ayo glared at me.   
“Something wrong, Doctor?” I fluttered my eyelashes at him.   
“Yes, you’ve been gone for more than a week, Father is worried out of his mind!” He snapped.   
“Well, I’m on my way to see him now, not that it’s any of your business.” I turned and headed up the stairs.   
“Mother!” Shaun pulled me into a tight hug. I hugged him back. Something felt… wrong about this. “Where have you been?”  
“I… might have fallen off of a building.” I chuckled. Shaun pulled away. His father’s blue eyes bore into me. I bit my lip. God, I missed Daniel.  
Daniel?  
“A building? Mother what-”  
“I don’t know, son. I was fighting with-” Not Deacon. “Hancock” THAT’S WORSE! “And I guess I took too many steps forward, or I got shot or something. The next thing I knew, I was in Goodneighbor getting patched up by their doctor.”   
Shaun looked away, sighing frustratedly. “Mother, I thought you weren’t going to travel with that creature anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if he pushed you!” He exclaimed.   
“Shaun Nathaniel Smith,” He gave me a look. “I am a grown woman. Hancock is my closest friend, Ghoul or not. Besides, GoodNeighbor has given you trouble with Synths in the past, why not have someone who is close to the Mayor?”   
“I suppose. JUst, please be careful. We were just reunited. I don’t want to lose you.” We hugged again.   
“So, got anything good you need me to work on?” I sat across from Shaun on the couch.   
He shook his head.   
“No, I want you to rest for awhile, especially if you were injured like that. I can’t stand the thought of losing you.” I smirked.   
I sat with Shaun for a while longer, and then decided to head back up to the surface. Before too long, I would have to do something for Shaun, but I liked getting to sit with him.   
I teleported back to the Airport, picked up Danse, and headed off to help a settlement in need. IT was a good thing there was no shortage of them, or I would be bored out of my mind. 

A few days went by of Danse and I travelling together, and I insisted on stopping to see Hancock. Fahrenheit wouldn’t let me in the State House though. She said that he wasn’t in the Mood.   
“Just like most others.” I quipped, sitting on a bench across from Daisy’s Discounts. Danse was nervous in Goodneighbor. The Neighborhood Watch didn’t like him.   
I looked towards the State House, and jumped up.   
“RJ!” I ran over to him, and threw my arms around him. He cringed. “RJ, I haven’t seen you in weeks! Where have you-” He pushed me off of him.   
“Busy.” He snapped. I could feel Danse’s glare.   
“Busy, Rj, I got hurt, and you vanished. I’m still here, I’m-”  
“KAylee, I don’t think I want to see you anymore.” He finally looked me in the eyes. His brown eyes that were once so sweet and soft, were full of malice towards me.   
“Wh-what?” My chest tightened. “RJ-”  
“It’s for the best.” He sighed.   
“But- But why- what- did I do something- Rj…” Tears welled in my eyes. “Why?”   
MacCready just walked away. The man that I loved, that I thought loved me, just walked away. He wouldn’t even tell me why.


End file.
